first day of fall

today is the starting of my favorite season. it's got pumpkins, halloween, apples, pumpkin patches, costumes, makeup, ghosts, candy, hay rack rides, scary movies and a zillion other things. how can you not love it? when i went outside this morning it seemed almost as if our big oak was like, "what? fall's here?!" then WOOMF! like 200 leaves fell from it. i'm sad gardening season comes to a close seeing as that's what kept me busy all summer. no worries though because, duh... it'll be back.

steve and i have been talking a lot about different deep kinds of topics lately. the one that seems to be plaguing my mind is, how do you show someone something that they can't grasp? you can show someone how to climb a tree, the right places to put their feet, but that doesn't give them the strength to grab the next limb. how do you boost them? how do you show someone to overcome an obstacle that's inside themselves? is it even possible?



this post secret is messed up, but the horrible thing is i could almost see why she did it. it's a great show. fucked up humor for some reason tends to be my favorite.



aren't we all? :)



something very true we all should remember.

give my gun away when it's loaded

i finished a book tonight. it's the first of the true blood series. i decided that it's going to be one of my guilty pleasure bathtub reads.

music speaks to me a lot, especially lately. i've been really hooked on the gardenstate soundtrack, damien rice, and older HIM stuff. damien rice's cd "9" has really been speaking to me these last couple days.

i did a birth chart earlier today. i was pretty amused with the results. my sun sign is pisces (duh), my ascendant is leo, and my moon is virgo.

work in a few hours. think i should sleep? probally so.

finally, a day off.

i don't know if you've ever heard of post secret, but it's got to be one of the most genius things ever. people make little post cards with secrets on them and mail them to this guy who makes books and has a website featuring these secrets. people are always quick to point out differences, but hardly ever notice their similarities with other people. i think this website helps to clear that road block. sometimes a secret might seem like a huge thing that only you know, but it could also be shared with a million other people in the world.

i've always been tempted to send in a secret of mine, but the question is, which one? i have secrets that i haven't even discovered yet, or i'm just now starting to confront. i don't know that i would even know where to begin. i've seen post cards that hit me in the face like, "holy shit, i could've sent that in." i just wonder if there's a secret of mine that would affect anyone else like that. i know that the whole process is also completely anonymous, but i also half worry that someone would figure out it was my secret. some things are just meant to be secrets, you know? what's meant to be, will be i suppose.

the season finale of true blood is on tonight. i'm super excited to see what happens. i started reading the book series a few days ago. i've been reading slow because i know that the book is obviously different from the show. i don't really want to ruin either for me. i ran across some spoilers last night. i wanted to stick my fingers in my ears and scream "la la la laaa!!" but obviously my hand told my brain to shut the fuck up and clicked the page. so the story is half ruined for me, but maybe the director will take a different route from the books.

so i decided on the present i'm getting myself for yule this year. it's a bath tub caddy thingy. i read in the tub a lot and anyone who does that know it's a pain in the ass. so this has spots to put your book, a glass of wine, and random spots for other things. i'm super excited. i'm probally gonna get it tomorrow. i've already started wrapping presents. i'm super excited for yule this year.

lesson of the day: if you want it done right, or at all, do it yourself.

wax paper makes it go faster...

i've been watching an ass load of true blood over the internet lately. i'm super heavy into the story line. after watching an entire season in about 4 days, i've come to the conclusion that i want a vampire boyfriend. i don't wanna be what they call a "fang banger" someone who just has sex with vampires. from what i've seen, they can be down right passionate. i know this sounds odd, and chances are vampires probally aren't real, but damn.

on the subject of passion, i feel that i've got a huge lacking of it in my life right now. i wouldn't go as far to say that i hate my job, but i'm starting to go down that path. i feel that some of the few relationships i have with people aren't that great anymore. there's nothing new in my life, it's just so bleh. just about everything in my life feels so ridiculously ho-hum right now. i can't stand it. usually my ass is on fire about something going on in life but it's like i'm sitting in a bucket of ice or something. i think i'm just on one of my downhills i have every now and then. though i can't say i totally hate it. i honestly feel more inspired and creative this way. (not that i couldn't be normally.) i'm fucked up, i know.

lesson of the day:

if someone is having a bad day or just being a bossy little prick, don't say anything at all. if you do, be positive towards them so they realize what an ass they're being.

it's not like i didn't already know this lesson, but it seems to be much more prevalent in my life these days. though really, i don't know that being nice is getting me too far. it seems the people around me are meaner than they actually realize.

by the way, pickles has been on my lap helping me write this. woot woot for the weiner dog! he's the best friend i could've ever asked for. (minus the random poop on the floor.)

a friend had taken this picture of pickles. needless to say, pickles is a nosy dog.